Man shuts door right in woman’s goddamned face

item-thumbnailFrom Shawn on “The Manatee”: Man shuts door right in woman’s goddamned face

Quispamsis — A disturbing event took place in the early morning hours at the Quispamsis Village Place GoodLife gym. Twenty-three-year-old Amber Porter was preparing to enter the building for her morning spin class, when an unidentified man failed to hold the door open for her, causing it to close right in her face. While she…

Source: The Manatee
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New Brunswickers secretly OK with climate change

item-thumbnailFrom Shawn on “The Manatee”: New Brunswickers secretly OK with climate change

Miramichi — As the premiers conclude their meeting with the newly minted Prime Minister on the hot topic of climate change, some New Brunswickers are admitting that they are secretly fine with it. While human activity continues to turn up the heat on the planet, many residents of the Picture Province are not only OK with…

Source: The Manatee
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Confused New Brunswickers mistake victims of crime with criminals

item-thumbnailFrom Shawn on “The Manatee”: Confused New Brunswickers mistake victims of crime with criminals

Sussex — In a colossal misunderstanding, some residents of New Brunswick have mistaken the victims of the ongoing civilian conflict in Sussex with the actual criminals who destroyed much of the town. Now, as the province tries to help the Sussex residents displaced by the conflict, the confusion is causing concern among those who believe…

Source: The Manatee
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Norton: Montreal ‘being pussies’ about raw sewage

From Shawn on “The Manatee”: Norton: Montreal ‘being pussies’ about raw sewage

Saint John — Mayor Mel Norton has had enough of the complaining and hand-wringing about Montreal’s sewage release into the St. Lawrence River. In his first public comment on the caca commotion in the City of Saints, Norton says he’s done listening to the whining about wee-wee and it’s time for Montreal to just get it over with already. “In…

Source: The Manatee
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Uninformed jocks want more Syrian referees in New Brunswick

618From Shawn on “The Manatee”: Uninformed jocks want more Syrian referees in New Brunswick

Saint John — Uninformed teenage jocks from all over New Brunswick are banding together with a common message for all levels of government: they want to see more Syrian referees settled in this province as soon as possible, preferably by year-end. “We know all about the Syrian referee crisis,” said 15-year-old jock Asher Gibson. “My…

Source: The Manatee
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Official Languages Commissioner investigating more of her own complaints

From Shawn on “The Manatee”: Official Languages Commissioner investigating more of her own complaints

Fredericton — New Brunswick’s Commissioner of Official Languages, Katherine d’Entremont, is launching additional investigations into her own complaints against her friends, family, neighbours and local businesses, after numerous individuals unwittingly failed to meet her unknown expectations. This revelation follows the public disclosure that she filed her own official languages complaint as well as the resulting investigation…

Source: The Manatee
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